We all face fears on a regular basis. At least most of us do. The Universe often throws things in our path so that we can learn to rise up. Fear can be debilitating, and often times even paralyzing. That is why it is so important that we face them as they come head-on. That IS why we must face our fears. If we don’t, we may never know just how amazing and powerful we are.
I was invited to do my first public speaking gig in a nearby city. When I was asked if I would consider speaking, I didn’t hesitate saying “yes,” although every part of my BE-ing was screaming “NO!” I had no idea what came over me for that brief moment and wondered if something or someone had taken over my body. Public speaking has always been one of my biggest fears. I can remember coming close to several nervous breakdowns during my college years when I was required to take part in such barbaric practices. I remember taking some sort of oath the last time my knees buckled while displaying my inadequacies on stage in front of my classmates: “I will never do this again. I will never do this again. I will never do this again.” Well, life is funny, and The Universe sure has one heck of a sense of humor! It’s true, if we continue to call on our angels and tell them “I’m ready,” they will put things in our path that they know we can conquer.
As time for my debut grew closer, I found myself on some sort of anxiety roller coaster. At times I felt calm and clearheaded, but that could very quickly turn into feelings of anxiety, panic, and dread. I spent a lot of time at one of my favorite places, a local nature park, asking my angels and guides to help me. I prayed daily saying things like, “Please give me courage and tell me what to say.” They (the angels) never cease to amaze me. They always come through when I call on them. I began seeing myself on stage, as if I was watching a movie. I was telling my story and it appeared to be so easy. I stood so poised and the words flowed from my mouth quite eloquently. It was as if I had been doing it all my life. It seemed so easy. I would even dream about my speech and watched as it all came together so effortlessly. “Ahhhh,” I thought. “I’m ready.”
The day of the event came and I felt a sense of calm and ease within myself. I knew that this was something I had to do and I knew that it was pivotal for whatever was coming next for me. I can’t begin to tell you the number of times I was guided to just “take a leap of faith,” only to be rewarded beyond my expectations for doing so. I had my speech all lined up in my head and felt confident about my message. The angels had helped me “know” what to say. I decided to head out to my favorite place where I could sit quietly and meditate. As I sat quietly, watching the seagulls on the water, I heard someone say “You got this.” I didn’t know who had said it. Maybe the angels or maybe it was my own inner voice. It didn’t matter. I felt unstoppable! “Yes,” I thought. “I can do this.”
It took just a few minutes for that amazing state I found myself in to begin to be overtaken with that little voice in my head, that voice I had worked so hard to keep quiet. I guess my ego had a little something to say about all of this “nonsense.” I had managed to keep it quiet for the past several days but I guess it didn’t like that I had decided to step up. My ego wanted desperately to “help me” and so here it came offering some “logical” advice. Now remember, I had asked the angels for help and they had delivered. They had literally shown me how my speech was going to flow and had reassured me that everything was going to be okay. For that reason, I hadn’t typed anything up. I didn’t have any notes or outline to follow. I didn’t have anything down on paper for that matter. I was going to wing it. After all, I had seen myself standing on stage and heard the words coming out so amazingly and had even dreamt about it. I never really felt the need to put anything down on paper…….until that moment, when my ego said “ARE YOU NUTS?!” Oh, that voice was strong and loud and I had heard it many times before. I had been doing so well to keep it quiet and yet I found myself right back in its mighty grasp once again. That peaceful easy feeling began to fade as I hurried to my car. I rushed home to put my message down on paper as I only had a couple of hours before the event began. I bellied up to my computer and started typing away. I was so determined to get my message down on paper that I didn’t even realize that I had shifted out of my calm and peaceful state to one of desperation and panic. I typed emphatically, making sure I covered everything I planned to talk about. “Oh crap, don’t let me forget anything,” I said to whomever was listening. I was only a few sentences in when lo and behold, my computer crashed. Now normally I would’ve probably freaked out for awhile, but as soon as my computer crashed, I just started laughing……hysterically! I knew the angels had decided to put me out of my misery because as soon as I stopped laughing, I heard, “You don’t need a piece of paper. Just tell your story and let us take care of the rest.” And with that, I let it go.
The time of the event finally came and it was a complete success. I told my story and even cried a few times as I let my heart sing. Yes, my microphone shook from time to time but the angels helped me get through it all unscathed. Several people came up to me afterwards and told me that I had done an amazing job. They loved my story! Ahhhh, I couldn’t thank the angels enough. They had (once again) come to my rescue and they had helped me face my demon. I had done it. I had conquered my biggest fear of all and I felt unstoppable!
I can honestly say that public speaking is no longer my biggest fear. Now that I think about it, I’m not sure what my biggest fear is since I conquered the one that had ruled my life for so long. It seems that way with everything doesn’t it? We fear so many things and instead of facing them and kicking their ass, we crawl into our little holes and hide, hoping they will all just go away. I can tell you firsthand, that once you face your fears, they just won’t seem so scary. Call your angels in and ask them to help you. Start small if you need to but just be sure to start. Haven’t your fears been running the show for too long already? I know mine had. I feel unstoppable now and I know I wouldn’t feel this way if I had continued to hide, from myself, from others, from the amazing person that God has intended me to be. I can’t wait to see what they have planned for me next!